Decided to blog a little while the cake layers are baking in the oven. I went to Andaulusia today and had lunch with Meredith and stayed with her for a little while this afternoon. I enjoyed our time together!! As I sat across from her at her desk, I am awed at how beautiful she is. I'm not talking about her outer beauty, I, as a mama, know she's beautiful! I'm talking about the inner beauty that I see in her and I know others do. She's a remarkable daughter, sister, wife, mother, and friend. She has taught me so much in the last 114 days. Lessons of life are hard and all too often painful, but Meredith has shown me, by her example how to find rest and comfort in our Almighty Lord. She has faced her circumstances from the humble perspective that by trusting and thanking God, He will give you His unfathomable peace.
With Kaidi's day of arrival soon approaching, I have so many questions, silly ones, I'm sure, but I do have lots of questions. I know this is NOT my first grand child, but this is the first one to come to us after our loss. A beautiful little girl, that I hope and pray I, myself is NOT asking too much from. I know I am different, I know I do NOT look at life, as I once did. I am having a hard time with my emotions. I am praying that once Kaidi is placed in my arms, that all these fears, hurts and uncertainties will be forever lifted from me, maybe NOT forever, but for that one moment that I am holding her, I will feel joy....
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I to have been praying that little Kaidi helps heal a little of the pain and other emotions you all face daily. I think of you all so much.
ReplyDeleteI pray for and think of your family so often. I pray that little Kaidi will bring you and your family joy again during these trying times ~ I'm sure once she is in your arms you will be filled with such love and a smile will be put on your face and in your heart. I think I speak for a lot of people when I say this, but you and your daughter both, are an inspiration to a lot of people...the fact that your faith has stayed so strong and you can even manage to open your eyes each day, let alone blog and open up your feelings to those you know and don't know, is something I'm in constant awe of. I've learned so much from you both and don't even know you. I thank you for that...I hope that blogging has been theraputic in a way for you both. I can feel the love you have for your family in your posts and I now Kaidi will feel the same way :) Take care and stay strong~
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